Thursday, December 25, 2014

Christmas: Funny and Thoughtful Christmas Quotes and Short Poems

From Denny:  Well, now that we have finished Christmas breakfast at our house it's time to roll out these fun Christmas quotes and Christmas poems for you and yours to enjoy!

Oh, how rude of me not to give you the Christmas breakfast menu:  a Dutch Baby Oven Pancake with spiced cooked apples and a side of Honeysuckle Italian style ground Turkey made into a sausage which I spiced up extra with some seasoned brown rice, smokey paprika, garlic and extra virgin olive oil before shaping into small patties and cooking on the stovetop.  Yeah, it's a tough day at our house all right. :) 

And, yes, I made the roast turkey yesterday since we like to celebrate Christmas Eve as well so that pressure is non-existent.  Made a wonderful wet rub for the turkey that sat a day uncovered in the fridge to marinate:  rubbed under the skin and on top with a mixture of red moscato wine, extra virgin oil, and lovely spices and herbs like marjoram, rosemary, sage, ginger, sea salt, black pepper, smokey paprika, garlic powder, a touch of lite soy sauce and more.  Blanched the green beans earlier in the week so all that needs to be done today is to heat them up in clarified butter and some spices as a side dish.  All the cooking left is to bake the Louisiana sweet potatoes which are a divine dish in themselves they are so sweet!

For plenty of holiday recipes and recipes for the entire year you can check out my four food blogs where I collect the best of our local cooks, my own recipes and variations, as well as the news and food networks:  

Joyful X 2 Rectangular Canvas Pillow

Inspire: Keep your Joy up and flowing to attract order and harmony into your life all year long!  Available in t-shirts for men, women, kids and baby along with bedding, pillows, dining, entertaining and technology like for your latest phone case!  Phone cases listed here.

Oh, and the ads are for my Cafe Press store, Denny Lyon Gifts, where the proceeds go to the local food bank, Greater Baton Rouge Food Bank - and to St. Jude's Children's Research Hospital.  

St. Jude's has been really good to families on the Gulf Coast where cancer hits hard (because of all the chemical plants it's been called Cancer Alley.  The doctors are so astute they can tell a family almost exactly the block they live on they know the cancer cluster data so well).  Those doctors are miracle workers and the staff is so dedicated.  It really touches your heart there are such wonderful people working so hard to make the world a better place - especially for children.  

Our local food bank does an incredible job as well, feeding military families as well as civilian, extending out to almost half of the state to help those in need.  

So, check out Denny Lyon Gifts to purchase something, no matter how small, to help contribute through proceeds.  Also, be sure to check the front page of Cafe Press for flash sales and steep discounts to help your wallet all year long!  Cafe Press is always running some type of discount all year, practically every other day, so check back often.

Merry Christmas to my Christian friends.  Happy Holidays to my Jewish friends and those of other religions and beliefs.  And Goodwill to my atheist friends (who feel uncomfortable during the holiday season) but to let you know you are always welcome at our house and we love you just as much any time of the year.  The holiday season is the time to set aside the the political and religious squabbling and remind us all to:   just Share the Love.

Funny Christmas Quotes

Never worry about the size of your Christmas tree.  In the eyes of children, they are all 30 feet tall. - Larry Wilde, The Merry Book of Christmas

One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day.  Don't clean it up too quickly. - Andy Rooney

Christmas is a time when you get homesick - even when you're home. - Carol Nelson

Instead of being a time of unusual behavior, Christmas is perhaps the only time in the year when people can obey their natural impulses and express their true sentiments without feeling self-conscious and, perhaps, foolish.  Christmas, in short, is about the only chance a man has to be himself. - Francis C. Farley

Christmas is a time when kids tell Santa what they want and adults pay for it.  Deficits are when adults tell the government what they want and their kids pay for it. - Richard Lamm

2 Merry Christmas Greeting Cards (pk Of 10)

Check it out Santa watching you with a wink and a smile!  This design also available: in t-shirts for men, women, kids and baby along with technology like phone cases and in bedding, dining, entertainment, shower curtains, 2 sizes of curtains, area rugs, clocks, ornaments, jewelry, pet tags and food bowls, pillows, aprons, stuffed animals, mugs and more.  Yes, I really had fun with this design! :)  Phone Cases are listed here.

2 Merry Christmas Dark Greeting Cards (pk Of 10)

Check it out Santa watching you with a wink and a smile!  This darker version of the design is also available in a padfolio for your office and in dark t-shirts and hoodies for men, women, kids and baby too!

More Funny Christmas Quotes

From a commercial point of view, if Christmas did not exist it would be necessary to invent it. - Katharine Whitehorn

In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it 'Christmas' and went to church; the Jews called it 'Hanukkah' and went to synagogue; the atheists went to parties and drank.  People passing each other on the street would say 'Merry Christmas!' or 'Happy Hanukkah!'  or (to the atheists) 'Look out for the wall!' - Dave Barry, "Christmas Shopping:  A Survivor's Guide"

Oh look, yet another Christmas TV special!  How touching to have the meaning of Christmas brought to us by cola, fast food, and beer.... Who'd have ever guessed that product consumption, popular entertainment, and spirituality would mix so harmoniously? - Bill Watterson, Calvin & Hobbes

Oh, for the good old days when people would stop Christmas shopping when they ran out of money. - Anonymous

Christmas is the season when you buy this year's gifts with next year's money. - Anonymous

Ice Skating

The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes

If "ifs" and "buts" were candy and nuts, wouldn't it be a Merry Christmas? - Don Meredith

Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice. - Anonymous

There is a remarkable breakdown of taste and intelligence at Christmastime.  Mature, responsible grown men wear neckties made of holly leaves and drink alcoholic beverages with raw egg yolks and cottage cheese in them. - P.J. O'Rourke

No matter how carefully you stored the lights last year, they will be snarled again this Christmas. - Robert Kirby

Clayton Holidays Staircase

The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C.  This wasn't for any religious reasons.  They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin. - Jay Leno

The one thing women don't want to find in their stockings on Christmas morning is their husband. - Joan Rivers

The worst gift is a fruitcake.  There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other. - Johnny Carson

Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live. - Dennis Miller

Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson

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Inspire: Keep your Joy up and flowing to attract order and harmony into your life all year long!  Available in t-shirts for men, women, kids and baby along with stationery for greeting cards, postcards and note cards and also featured in bedding, pillows, dining, entertaining and technology like for your latest phone cases!

Vintage Sled

I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark. - Dick Gregory

Three phrases that sum up Christmas are:  Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men, and Batteries not Included. - Anonymous

Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit. - Kin Hubbard

Once again we find ourselves enmeshed in the Holiday Season, that very special time of year when we join with our loved ones in sharing centuries-old traditions such as trying to find a parking space at the mall.  We traditionally do this in my family by driving around the parking lot until we see a shopper emerge from the mall, then we follow her, in very much the same spirit as the Three Wise Men, who 2,000 years ago followed a star, week after week, until it led them to a parking space. - Dave Barry

Victorian children

Christmas Poems

Love came down at Christmas,

Love all lovely, Love Divine;
Love was born at Christmas;
Star and angels gave the sign.
 - Christina Rossetti

Wouldn't life be worth the living

Wouldn't dreams be coming true
If we kept the Christmas spirit
All the whole year through?
 - Anonymous

Oh! lovely voices of the sky

Which hymned the Saviour's birth,
Are ye not singing still on high,
Ye that sang, "Peace on earth"?
 - Felicia Hemans

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, - not even a mouse:
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St Nicholas soon would be there....
 - Clement Clarke Moore

O Christmas Sun!  What holy task is thine!

To fold a world in the embrace of God!
 - Guy Wetmore Carryl

We ring the bells and we raise the strain

We hang up garlands everywhere
And bid the tapers twinkle fair,
And feast and frolic - and then we go
Back to the same old lives again.
 - Susan Coolidge

Happy New Years Wishes Greeting Watch

May the New Year visit you with Prosperity, Good Health & Goodwill!

"Let Every Day Be Christmas" c. 1976 - click for full poem

Christmas is forever, not for just one day,

for loving, sharing, giving, are not to put away
like bells and lights and tinsel, in some box upon a shelf.
The good you do for others is good you do yourself...
 - Norman Wesley Brooks (U.S. design engineer, 1923-2002)

This December,
That love weighs more than gold!
 - Josephine Dodge Daskam Bacon

A Christmas candle is a lovely thing;

It makes no noise at all,
But softly gives itself away.
 - Eva Logue

'Twas Christmas broach'd the mightiest ale;

'Twas Christmas told the merriest tale;
A Christmas gambol oft could cheer
The poor man's heart through half the year.
 - Walter Scott

Only in souls the Christ is brought to birth,

And there He lives and dies.
 - Alfred Noyes

At Christmas play and make good cheer,

For Christmas comes but once a year
- Thomas Tusser

Sing hey!  Sing hey!

For Christmas Day;
Twine mistletoe and holly.
For a friendship glows
In winter snows,
And so let's all be jolly!
 - Anonymous

It is the Christmas time:

And up and down 'twixt heaven and earth,
In glorious grief and solemn mirth,
The shining angels climb.
 - Dinah Maria Mulock

Be merry all, be merry all,

With holly dress the festive hall;
Prepare the song, the feast, the ball,
To welcome merry Christmas.
 - William Robert Spencer

Great little One! whose all-embracing birth

Lifts Earth to Heaven, stoops Heaven to Earth.
 - Richard Crashaw

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Inspire: Keep your Joy up and flowing to attract order and harmony 
into your life all year long!

The Frick Art & Historical Center in Pittsburgh’s historic East End

I love the Christmas-tide, and yet,

I notice this, each year I live;
I always like the gifts I get,
But how I love the gifts I give!
 - Carolyn Wells

'Tis blessed to bestow, and yet,
Could we bestow the gifts we get,
And keep the ones we give away,
How happy were our Christmas day!
 - Carolyn Wells

Except the Christ be born again tonight

In dreams of all men, saints and sons of shame,
The world will never see his kingdom bright.
 - Vachel Lindsay

At Christmas-tide the open hand

Scatters its bounty o'er sea and land,
And none are left to grieve alone,
For Love is heaven and claims its own.
 - Margaret Elizabeth Sangster

Let Christmas not become a thing

Merely of merchant's trafficking,
Of tinsel, bell and holly wreath
And surface pleasure, but beneath
The childish glamour, let us find
Nourishment for soul and mind.
Let us follow kinder ways
Through our teeming human maze,
And help the age of peace to come
From a Dreamer's martyrdom.
 - Madeline Morse

Thomas Nast Santa

At Christmas

A man is at his finest towards the finish of the year;
He is almost what he should be when the Christmas season's here;
Then he's thinking more of others than he's thought the months before,
And the laughter of his children is a joy worth toiling for.
He is less a selfish creature than at any other time;
When the Christmas spirit rules him he comes close to the sublime...
 - Edgar Guest

I heard the bells on Christmas Day

Their old, familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet
The words repeat
Of peace on earth, good-will to men!
 - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Roses are reddish

Violets are bluish
If it weren't for Christmas
We'd all be Jewish.
 - Benny Hill

May the spirit of Christmas bring you peace,
The gladness of Christmas give you hope,
The warmth of Christmas grant you love.
 - Anonymous

May you have the gladness of Christmas which is hope;

The spirit of Christmas which is peace;
The heart of Christmas which is love.
 - Ada V. Hendricks

Happy New Years Wishes Greeting King Duvet

May the New Year visit you with Prosperity, Good Health & Goodwill!

Biltmore House
Biltmore House in Asheville, North Carolina

White Christmas

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas,

Just like the ones I used to know,
Where the tree tops glisten
And children listen
To hear sleigh bells in the snow...
 - Irving Berlin

Whatever else be lost among the years,

Let us keep Christmas still a shining thing;
Whatever doubts assail us, or what fears,
Let us hold close one day, remembering
Its poignant meaning for the hearts of men.
Let us get back our childlike faith again.
 - Grace Noll Crowell

Serious Christmas Quotes

Christmas gift suggestions:  To your enemy, forgiveness.  To an opponent, tolerance.  To a friend, your heart.  To a customer, service.  To all, charity.  To every child, a good example.  To yourself, respect.   - Oren Arnold

Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful. -  Norman Vincent Peale

He who has not Christmas in his heart will never find it under a tree. - Roy L. Smith

I have always thought of Christmas time, when it has come round, as a good time; a kind, forgiving, charitable time; the only time I know of, in the long calendar of the year, when men and women seem by one consent to open their shut-up hearts freely, and to think of people below them as if they really were fellow passengers to the grave, and not another race of creatures bound on other journeys. - Charles Dickens

Christmas is the gentlest, loveliest festival of the revolving year - and yet, for all that, when it speaks, its voice has strong authority. - W.J. Cameron

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree:  the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other. - Burton Hillis

Joyful X 2 Greeting Cards (pk Of 10)

Joyful X 2 Greeting Cards (pk Of 10)

Inspire: Keep your Joy up and flowing to attract order and harmony 
into your life all year long!

Happy, happy Christmas, that can win us back to the delusions of our childish days; that can recall to the old man the pleasures of his youth; that can transport the sailor and the traveller, thousands of miles away, back to his own fire-side and his quiet home! - Charles Dickens, The Pickwick Papers, 1836

There has been only one Christmas - the rest are anniversaries. - W.J. Cameron

Christmas is a necessity.  There has to be at least one day of the year to remind us that we're here for something else besides ourselves. - Eric Sevareid

Our hearts grow tender with childhood memories and love of kindred, and we are better throughout the year for having, in spirit, become a child again at Christmas-time. - Laura Ingalls Wilder

May Peace be your gift at Christmas and your blessing all year through! - Anonymous

I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year. - Charles Dickens

Christmas is the season for kindling the fire of hospitality in the hall, the genial flame of charity in the heart. - Washington Irving

Gifts of time and love are surely the basic ingredients of a truly merry Christmas. - Peg Bracken

Isn't it funny that at Christmas something in you gets so lonely for - I don't know what exactly, but it's something that you don't mind so much not having at other times. - Kate L. Bosher

At Christmas, all roads lead home. - Marjorie Holmes

It is Christmas in the heart that puts Christmas in the air. - W.T. Ellis

For centuries men have kept an appointment with Christmas.  Christmas means fellowship, feasting, giving and receiving, a time of good cheer, home. - W.J. Ronald Tucker

Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love! - Hamilton Wright Mabie

Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen. - Anonymous, attributed to a 7-year-old named Bobby

When we were children we were grateful to those who filled our stockings at Christmas time.  Why are we not grateful to God for filling our stockings with legs? - G.K. Chesterton

I wish we could put up some of the Christmas spirit in jars and open a jar of it every month. - Harlan Miller

Happy New Years Wishes Cloth Napkins

May the New Year visit you with Prosperity, Good Health & Goodwill!

Christmas is the day that holds all time together. - Alexander Smith

I sometimes think we expect too much of Christmas Day.  We try to crowd into it the long arrears of kindliness and humanity of the whole year.  As for me, I like to take my Christmas a little at a time, all through the year.  And thus I drift along into the holidays - let them overtake me unexpectedly - waking up some fine morning and suddenly saying to myself:  "Why, this is Christmas Day!" - David Grayson

Christmas is not as much about opening our presents as opening our hearts. - Janice Maeditere

"It came without ribbons!  It came without tags!  It came without packages, boxes or bags!"... Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before!  "Maybe Christmas," he thought, "doesn't come from a store.  Maybe Christmas... perhaps... means a little bit more!" - Dr. Seuss, How the Grinch Stole Christmas!

Perhaps the best Yuletide decoration is being wreathed in smiles. - Anonymous

For the spirit of Christmas fulfills the greatest hunger of mankind. - Loring A. Schuler

This is the message of Christmas:  We are never alone. - Taylor Caldwell

Tradition: sit with husband in a room lit only by tree lights and remember that our blessings outnumber the lights. Happy Christmas to all. - Betsy Cañas Garmon, (2008 tweet, @wildthyme)

Christmas is for children.  But it is for grown-ups too.  Even if it is a headache, a chore, and nightmare, it is a period of necessary defrosting of chill and hide-bound hearts. - Lenora Mattingly Weber

To perceive Christmas through its wrapping becomes more difficult with every year. - E.B. White, "The Distant Music of the Hounds," The Second Tree from the Corner, 1954

I can understand people simply fleeing the mountainous effort Christmas has become... but there are always a few saving graces and finally they make up for all the bother and distress. - May Sarton

Joyful X 2 Long Sleeve Maternity T-Shirt

Inspire: Keep your Joy up and flowing to attract order and harmony 
into your life all year long!

Fail not to call to mind, in the course of the twenty-fifth of this month, that the Divinest Heart that ever walked the earth was born on that day; and then smile and enjoy yourselves for the rest of it; for mirth is also of Heaven's making. - Leigh Hunt

The perfect Christmas tree?  All Christmas trees are perfect! - Charles N. Barnard

I do like Christmas on the whole.... In its clumsy way, it does approach Peace and Goodwill.  But it is clumsier every year. - E.M. Forster

The Church does not superstitiously observe days, merely as days, but as memorials of important facts.  Christmas might be kept as well upon one day of the year as another; but there should be a stated day for commemorating the birth of our Saviour, because there is danger that what may be done on any day, will be neglected. - Samuel Johnson

As long as we know in our hearts what Christmas ought to be, Christmas is. - Eric Sevareid

When we recall Christmas past, we usually find that the simplest things - not the great occasions - give off the greatest glow of happiness. - Bob Hope

It is the one season of the year when we can lay aside all gnawing worry, indulge in sentiment without censure, assume the carefree faith of childhood, and just plain "have fun."  Whether they call it Yuletide, Noel, Weinachten, or Christmas, people around the earth thirst for its refreshment as the desert traveler for the oasis. - D.D. Monroe

Christmas!  The very word brings joy to our hearts.  No matter how we may dread the rush, the long Christmas lists for gifts and cards to be bought and given - when Christmas Day comes there is still the same warm feeling we had as children, the same warmth that enfolds our hearts and our homes. - Joan Winmill Brown

The best Christmas trees come very close to exceeding nature. - Andy Rooney

What is Christmas?  It is tenderness for the past, courage for the present, hope for the future.  It is a fervent wish that every cup may overflow with blessings rich and eternal, and that every path may lead to peace. - Agnes M. Pahro

The message of Christmas is that the visible material world is bound to the invisible spiritual world. - Anonymous

Were I a philosopher, I should write a philosophy of toys, showing that nothing else in life need to be taken seriously, and that Christmas Day in the company of children is one of the few occasions on which men become entirely alive. - Robert Lynd

Mankind is a great, an immense, family.  This is proved by what we feel in our hearts at Christmas. - Pope John XXIII

There are no strangers on Christmas Eve. - Mildred Cram and Adele Comandini

Christmas is not a time or a season but a state of mind.  To cherish peace and good will, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas. - Calvin Coolidge, 1927


Like snowflakes, my Christmas memories gather and dance - each beautiful, unique and too soon gone. - Deborah Whipp

When Christmas bells are swinging above the fields of snow, we hear sweet voices ringing from lands of long ago, and etched on vacant places are half-forgotten faces of friends we used to cherish, and loves we used to know. - Ella Wheeler Wilcox

I have always thought of Christmas time, when it has come round apart from the veneration due to its sacred name and origin, if anything belonging to it can be apart from that - as a good time; a kind, forgiving, charitable, pleasant time. - Charles Dickens

There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child. - Erma Bombeck, I Lost Everything in the Post-Natal Depression

Joyful X 2 Teddy Bear

Inspire: Keep your Joy up and flowing to attract order and harmony 
into your life all year long!

I hear that in many places something has happened to Christmas; that it is changing from a time of merriment and carefree gaiety to a holiday which is filled with tedium; that many people dread the day and the obligation to give Christmas presents is a nightmare to weary, bored souls; that the children of enlightened parents no longer believe in Santa Claus; that all in all, the effort to be happy and have pleasure makes many honest hearts grow dark with despair instead of beaming with good will and cheerfulness. - Julia Peterkin, A Plantation Christmas, 1934

The earth has grown old with its burden of care,
But at Christmas it always is young.... - Phillips Brooks

Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard

Have yourself a merry little Christmas, make the Yuletide gay. - Ralph Blane

It is good to be children sometimes, and never better than at Christmas when its mighty Founder was a child Himself. - Charles Dickens

I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included. - Bernard Manning

Christmas begins about the first of December with an office party and ends when you finally realize what you spent, around April fifteenth of the next year. - P.J. O'Rourke, Modern Manners

Keep your Christmas-heart open all the year round. - Jessica Archmint

The universal joy of Christmas is certainly wonderful.  We ring the bells when princes are born, or toll a mournful dirge when great men pass away.  Nations have their red-letter days, their carnivals and festivals, but once in the year and only once, the whole world stands still to celebrate the advent of a life. - Anonymous

Christmas is a time to open our hearts to God and his gifts.  Just like the rest of the year. - Anonymous

Victorian Christmas Crackers

Christmas Eve was a night of song that wrapped itself about you like a shawl.  But it warmed more than your body.  It warmed your heart... filled it, too, with melody that would last forever. - Bess Streeter Aldrich

Even as an adult I find it difficult to sleep on Christmas Eve. Yuletide excitement is a potent caffeine, no matter your age. - Terri Guillemets

Christmas is a day of meaning and traditions, a special day spent in the warm circle of family and friends. - Margaret Thatcher

Christmas - that magic blanket that wraps itself about us, that something so intangible that it is like a fragrance.  It may weave a spell of nostalgia.  Christmas may be a day of feasting, or of prayer, but always it will be a day of remembrance - a day in which we think of everything we have ever loved. - Augusta E. Rundel

It is the most human and kindly of seasons, as fully penetrated and irradiated with the feeling of human brotherhood, which is the essential spirit of Christianity, as the month of June with sunshine and the balmy breath of roses. - George William Curtis

Joyful X 2 Large Mugs

Inspire: Keep your Joy up and flowing to attract order and harmony 
into your life all year long!

People can't concentrate properly on blowing other people to pieces if their minds are poisoned by thoughts suitable to the twenty-fifth of December. - Ogden Nash

Christmas in Bethlehem.  The ancient dream: a cold, clear night made brilliant by a glorious star, the smell of incense, shepherds and wise men falling to their knees in adoration of the sweet baby, the incarnation of perfect love. - Lucinda Franks

We hear the beating of wings over Bethlehem and a light that is not of the sun or of the stars shines in the midnight sky.  Let the beauty of the story take away all narrowness, all thought of formal creeds.  Let it be remembered as a story that has happened again and again, to men of many different races, that has been expressed through many religions, that has been called by many different names.  Time and space and language lay no limitations upon human brotherhood. - New York Times, 25 December 1937, quoted in Quotations for Special Occasions by Maud van Buren, 1938, published by The H.W. Wilson Company, New York

Which Christmas is the most vivid to me?  It's always the next Christmas. - Joanne Woodward

Victorian Fan Thank You Greeting Cards (Pk of 10)

Elegant vintage feathered fan and lady's hand updated in muted tones suitable for your best occasions: wedding, graduation, anniversary, birthday and more.  Remember to send your thank you notes for gifts received this holiday season!  More designs available; come see!

Check out my Christmas blog too:  A Christmas Post

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